3/2/08

Sun, 02 Mar 2008 08:04:32 GMT

Damn.
I haven't written in this thing in forever.
I don't know what really brought me to write in here.
I just guess when I was in the shower brushing the coke out of my teeth, I though "huh, spilling my heart out sounds fantastic,"
Bleh.
I wish some times things in my life could be easy like it use to be.
I am playing all the old music that I use to listen too.
It reminds me of kevin.
It makes me feel sick.

I am so tired of Ryan.
I mean, I am not like tired of him, I actually mean that I am just tired of being in a relationship.
But I don't want to break up.
I want us to go back to normal.
I want us to not have to try to make a conversation between us.
I want to fuck and be touched.

I am tired of thinking about him.
this shit is fuckin gay.

Anyways
I wish I had more coke so I could think, write more.
Some days are better then others.
I can't run forever.

I have been having this weird feeling lately; it's like, like the knowing that something bad is going to happen to the world and I am going to be left behind.
While my family is safe and okay I will be burning.
Ryan my love is like stuck and I can't save him.
I want to, I wish he could come with us.
I love him.
I hate talking about him!

I thought I had more to say, but I guess not.

peace.

Don't waste your time trying to shock the world.

3/2/08